HOW TO READ OTHERS-understanding personalities

Understanding personalities is the foundation for learning how to read others.

It is a certainty that your life success will depend on working with others in various relationships. It is imperative to have a basic understanding of different personality types in order to connect with people in an engaging and meaningful way and understanding personalities is the foundation for learning to read others.

Understanding the different personality types will enable you to quickly read and understand the person with whom you are engaged. It is a truth that there are 16 different basic types which have been identified and described. They are comprised of combinations of the four type dimensions listed below.

1.  EXTRAVERT OR INTROVERT
2. SENSOR OR INTUITIVE
3. THINKER OR FEELER
4. JUDGER OR PERCEIVER

These are considered the four main categories within which we all operate with basic combinations of the 4 either from one extreme to the other or scaled anywhere in between each polar opposite.  This personality scale and identification system is called the "Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator (named after the mother-daughter team that developed and refined it). It is considered and recognized world wide as an accurate method of typifying personalities of individuals. 

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Learning how to read others will be easy once you understand both your own personality type and can identify that of those with whom you are communicating. 

The process of learning how to read others begins with knowing yourself and understanding why you act the way you do. "to thine own self be true". Is a saying that everyone has heard but to really utilize the power of it one must understand their personality type which gives all the answers to our behaviors. Once you know your propensity for certain choices, actions, and patterns of thinking you will be half way to the end goal of better communication and efficacy in relationships. the next step comes from understanding the personality types and mixes of the main traits and identifying them in others. 

I highly recommend the book "the art of speed reading people"  by Paul and Barbara Tieger to help you easily grasp this dynamic of human relationship and the basic principle that drives our behavior and thought. Once you tap into the understanding and can recognize different personality types you will be able to more effectively guide your own decisions and actions because every relationship will be colored by these basic definitions of personality.

To begin to understand your own personality type reflect on the four main categories and see where you fit in. You can  get a brief overview of the 16 personality types below to help you understand how the combinations of the four dimensions fit together.

ISTJ - The Duty Fulfiller

hard working, focused and task oriented. work steadily toward goals. Accomplish tasks and stay on point

ISTP - The Mechanic

Quiet and reserved, interested in how and why things work. Excellent skills with mechanical things. Risk-takers who they live for the moment. Usually interested in and talented at extreme sports. Uncomplicated in their desires. Loyal to their peers and to their internal value systems, but not overly concerned with respecting laws and rules if they get in the way of getting something done. Detached and analytical, they excel at finding solutions to practical problems.

ISFJ - The Nurturer

Quiet, kind, and conscientious.  Others first. value security and traditions. Rich inner world of observations about people. Extremely perceptive of other's feelings. Interested in serving others.

ISFP - The Artist

Quiet, serious, sensitive and kind. Do not like conflict, and not likely to do things which may generate conflict. Loyal and faithful. Extremely well-developed senses Flexible and open-minded and creative. 

INFJ - The Protector

Quietly forceful, original, and sensitive. Tend to stick to things until they are done. Extremely intuitive about people, and concerned for their feelings. Well-developed value systems which they strictly adhere to.  Likely to be individualistic.

INFP - The Idealist

Quiet, reflective, and idealistic. Interested in serving humanity. Well-developed value system,  Extremely loyal. Usually talented writers. Mentally quick, visionary Interested helping people.

INTJ - The Scientist

Independent, original, analytical, and determined. Have an exceptional ability to turn theories into solid plans of action. Highly value knowledge, competence, and structure. Driven to derive meaning from their visions. Long-range thinkers. Have very high standards for performance. Natural leaders.

INTP - The Thinker

Logical, original, creative thinkers. Can become very excited about theories and ideas. Exceptionally capable and driven to turn theories into clear understandings. Highly value knowledge, competence and logic. Quiet and reserved, hard to get to know well. Individualistic

ESTP - The Doer

Friendly, adaptable, action-oriented. "Doers" who are focused on immediate results. Living in the here-and-now, they're risk-takers who live fast-paced lifestyles. Impatient with long explanations. Extremely loyal to their peers, but not usually respectful of laws and rules if they get in the way of getting things done. Great people skills.

ESTJ - The Guardian

Practical, traditional, and organized. Likely to be athletic. Loyal and hard-working. Like to be in charge. Exceptionally capable in organizing and running activities. "Good citizens" who value security and peaceful living.

ESFP - The Performer

People-oriented and fun-loving,  Living for the moment, they love new experiences. They dislike theory and impersonal analysis. Interested in serving others. center of attention in social situations.  common sense and practical

ESFJ - The Caregiver

ENFP - The Inspirer

Enthusiastic, idealistic, and creative. Able to do almost anything that interests them. Great people skills. Need to live life in accordance with their inner values. Excited by new ideas, but bored with details. Open-minded and flexible, with a broad range of interests and abilities.

ENFJ - The Giver

Popular and sensitive, with outstanding people skills. Externally focused, with real concern for how others think and feel. Usually dislike being alone. They see everything from the human angle, and dislike impersonal analysis. Very effective at managing people issues, and leading group discussions. Interested in serving others.

ENTP - The Visionary

Creative, resourceful, and intellectually quick. Good at a broad range of things. Enjoy debating issues, and may be into "one-up-manship". They get very excited about new ideas and projects, but may neglect the more routine aspects of life. Generally outspoken and assertive. They enjoy people and are stimulating company. Excellent ability to understand concepts and apply logic to find solutions.

ENTJ - The Executive

Assertive and outspoken - they are driven to lead. Excellent ability to understand difficult organizational problems and create solid solutions. Intelligent and well-informed, they usually excel at public speaking. They value knowledge and competence, and usually have little patience with inefficiency or disorganization.